Appreciation and reflection

Today I received a very thoughtful and time-involved message from a reader.  Not only do I take the time to read the messages I receive, but many I respond to and answer as many questions as I can and feel are appropriate enough to warrant a response.

The benefit of these messages is I get to hear the outside observations of others either having been in, going through now, or considering an affair.

When you’re right smack in the middle of the relationship, feelings and reason often get pushed to the side.  The only thing of importance is staying connected and relevant to your lover.

I’ve gone from a newly involved, guilt-ridden partner in the affair with a married man to a fully committed, totally convinced woman in love with a man who was certain he was planning to end his marriage and join his life with mine to a skeptical, borderline angry woman realizing the man who assured her he loved her was only saying so in order to keep the affair going.

It’s nice to finally come to the conclusion he will never leave his wife, he’s too involved and invested in what they have together, to do anything beyond using me for sex.

I no longer have the need or desire to spend time with him.  Yes, I do still consider him a friend.  We’ve shared many personal experiences, outside of the bedroom, this past year and almost a half.  I’d like to think he’ll remain my friend when I meet and begin a physical relationship with someone else.

He says he will, always, when I’ve discussed this with him, but like everything else he’s said I won’t know until it happens.  If not, no great loss – for me!



4 thoughts on “Appreciation and reflection

  1. Life is what it is, in each of our lives, Susan. Hopefully he’ll remain a friend to you (since we can all use a few friends, in r/l and/or online) just so long as you and he are “on the same page” in your view of each other and he treats your properly. I’ll stop here as this is between you two folks, and really none of my business.

    Oh, and just so you know, I read many blogs but the ones that catch my interest (like yours recently), I tend to comment to most, if not all of the blog posts that get issued. So, I’ll be back (as Arnold S. would say) 🙂

    Liked by 1 person

    • LOL I read your Arnold comment in his voice, not surprisingly!

      Follow along – I’ll blog about whether he’s willing and able to be a “friend” when that’s all that remains.

      Regardless, I’m going to make it and succeed!


      • One further point that I forgot to clarify last night, relating to your last blog post:

        You wrote: “The benefit of these messages is I get to hear the outside observations of others either having been in, going through now, or considering an affair.”
        Just for the record, I don’t qualify for any of these 3 categories of reader. Boring aren’t I? 🙂

        Liked by 1 person

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